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Tag Archives | Mourinho

His And Her Dark Materials: The Mind Games Of Samantha Brick & Alex Ferguson

April 8, 2012 · Comments ( 2 )

It was a very rare public show of emotion from Sir Alex Ferguson last Monday night. With his side having all but sealed the three points against a stubborn Blackburn, the old curmudgeon pumped both fists in a victorious gesture of defiance towards the visiting support. It was in that moment that it became clear that the latest threat to his supremacy at the game’s zenith had been vanquished should the remainder of the season conclude with Manchester United sweeping all before them. Manchester City had blown it. And he didn’t have to break sweat.

Mutiny At Stamford Bridge: The Downfall Of Villas-Boas

March 11, 2012 · Comments ( 2 )

In the space of seven days, two Russians have asserted their authority with characteristic ruthlessness. In Moscow, Vladimir Putin is currently snuffing out any dissent that has arisen from his contested election victory last Sunday. Meanwhile, in the borough of Hammersmith and Fulham, Roman Abramovich yet again demonstrated that his willingness to abandon his managerial appointments in favour of a dressing room dominated by preening egos is probably the greatest hindrance to Chelsea’s long-term future at the English game’s summit.

What’s The Point Of Scottish Football?

February 19, 2012 · Comments ( 42 )

The ignominy of seeing one of Britain’s biggest and most successful clubs this week finally accepting the grim reality of administration was one thing. Glasgow Rangers’ humiliation however, paled in comparison when the disparity that exists within Scottish football became glaringly apparent when the club had ten points deducted for its failure to balance the books. The upshot of this was in many respects the biggest indictment of football north of the border. Rangers were left trailing archrivals Celtic by fourteen points but nevertheless maintaining a nine point cushion of comfort from third placed Motherwell. The remainder of the season will inevitably be just a dull procession.

Heroes and Villains by Steven Hughes

October 19, 2011 · Comments ( 1 )

Tabloid journalists and the truth may be a contradiction in terms, but for this reporter honesty is clearly the best policy. Steven Hughes plonks himself onto the Football Sofa to explain why his relationship with his hero is a very subjective affair.

Terry and Lamps: An Homage

September 18, 2011 · Comments ( 0 )

Dispatches From A Football Sofa was fortunate enough to obtain a secret recording from Chelsea’s training ground this week. What follows is a transcript of a conversation that took place between stalwarts John Terry and Frank Lampard as they discuss the failed attempts to bring home Roman’s Holy Grail. Maybe.

El Clasico Arabe by JVA

September 7, 2011 · Comments ( 0 )

You’d think the Syrian people would have far more pressing concerns than which of Spain’s Big Two deserve their unbridled support, right? But as one Spanish Canadian found out, football and geopolitics seem to go together quite well. Dispatches is proud to welcome the mysteriously monikered JVA onto the Football Sofa.

A Conspiracy of Dunces

May 1, 2011 · Comments ( 1 )

“Sometimes to me it is disgusting to live in this world and have this football world for a living.” – Jose Mourinho

As the Happy Couple performed their much-anticipated nuptials and the world looked on with a sense of either wonderment, pride or sneering indifference (delete where applicable), much more sinister forces were at work behind the highly guarded barricades of Buckingham Palace. The royal family, you see, are not all that they might seem. According to sometime goalkeeper and now quasi-messianic oddball David Icke, the Windsors are in fact part of a shape-shifting reptilian race that controls and feeds on humanity. The sacrificial rituals required to carry on their domination led to the ‘murder’ of Princess Diana and there are grave concerns now for the future of the recently wed Duchess of Cambridge after her investiture.

The Last Shadow Puppets

February 27, 2011 · Comments ( 2 )

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The television screens of the world were dominated this week, by an aging man railing at unseen forces hell-bent on dislodging him from his seat of power. Underneath his umbrella, (somewhat reminiscent of that pathetically iconic snapshot of Steve McClaren watching helplessly as his England regime dissolved in the Wembley deluge), Colonel Muamar Gaddafi ranted and foamed at the mouth blaming the twin evils of Al-Qaeda and drugs for the unrest engulfing Libya. Puffy-eyed and increasingly deluded, like any other shameless egoist, he doggedly failed to claim any responsibility for his own failings and threatened repercussions, promising to ‘cleanse’ the country of its enemies.

Won’t Get Fooled Again?

December 12, 2010 · Comments ( 5 )

I was labelled ‘cynical’ this week. In my opinion unfairly so. Because as I understand the term, a ‘cynic’ is someone who readily dismisses subjects and topics with an air of negativity and a lack of faith. A cynic is someone who participates in a grown-up discussion about a particular theme but stifles any possible outcome with sneering suspicion. In short, a cynic for me, is the kind of person who plugs up his earholes with his fingers and says ‘no’. If people are so keen to attach labels to others, than the term I would give myself is that of a ‘pessimistic optimist’.

Read more on Won’t Get Fooled Again?…

Homage To Catalonia

December 1, 2010 · Comments ( 1 )

Note: This Dispatch is replete with superlatives. Apologies.

It’s Wednesday, I know. Dispatches comes out on Sundays. But there are some times in life when traditions need to be subverted. What needs to be said couldn’t wait until the end of the week. We’d all be too concerned with the fallout of England’s failed/successful (delete where applicable) bid to host the World Cup. We’d all be salivating at a second virtuoso display in the space of a week from Dimitar Berbatov. Or hailing Ian Holloway’s abrasive style of man-management as his Blackpool team laid a buoyant Manchester United to the sword. Football, like life moves very fast… is it really nearly Christmas?