As featured in The Guardian\
It’s the final Wednesday Dispatch, so what better way to bring a cracking season to a conclusion than by handing the Sofa over to someone who sits on it every day. Mrs Theoharis never knew what she was letting herself in for. Let her explain.
Read more on So I Married A Football Blogger by Nina Theoharis…
The Media Studies student with a basic knowledge of how audiences consume media texts will tell you all about the famed Hypodermic Needle Model. This was a theory that came into prominence in the 1920s that suggested audiences passively digest information without question. As this era ushered in the use of propaganda by the Soviets and later the Nazis, it was more or less accepted that people could be manipulated into thinking what the ‘powers-that-be’ wanted them to believe.
It’s all about Pelè’s Beautiful Game and we should all be worshipping at the altar of the Camp Nou right? Not everybody thinks so. Like a Vandal striking at the gates of Rome, Arsenal fan Natasha Henry is here to celebrate the non-aesthetes. Yes, she’s an Arsenal fan.
Note: This Dispatch trades in lazy stereotypes. Newcastle fans, read to the end.
On a trip up to Edinburgh on the East Coast Main Line last August, one of the stops en route was Newcastle. As the train approached the city, the Tyne Bridge emerged with industrial majesty from the sunny haze of the train’s window and I inexplicably felt a slight shiver of awe. Almost immediately, as we waited to pull away from the station, we were greeted with the sight of a man in a Newcastle home shirt banging on one of the station platform’s vending machines uttering barely decipherable curses, having lost his money whilst trying to stay steady on his feet.
Read more on Our Friends In The North: The Rise And Rise Of Newcastle United…
It would seem that Dispatches has slipped into the realms of the parallel universe this week. On Sunday, it was Scott Parker as Biggles whilst this Wednesday’s post tells the true-life tale of a very fictitious character. Are you sitting comfortably? Roger Domeneghetti wants to tell you an amazing story…
Read more on Roy Race: The Unauthorised Biography by Roger Domeneghetti…
Around this time of year we’re apparently expected to suspend our natural proclivities for disbelieving. We’re expected to believe that our bank balances are healthy when our monthly statements depressingly prove otherwise, so that we can keep the family happy by lavishing them with cheaply manufactured toot. We’re also meant to believe that a benevolent pensioner in a red suit and a white beard scales down our non-existent chimneys to reward the goodness of children across the globe. Moreover, we’re asked to believe that the Big Man sent down his son and heir to save us all from ourselves on December the 25th, coincidentally synchronising his arrival with ancient pagan festivities. Why consider the boring facts when stuffing ourselves with dry turkey and sugary puddings feels so damned good, right?
Read more on I Believe In Miracles: Why Spurs Will Win The Premier League…
Another week passes and once again another manager finds himself under the overhanging cloud of impending doom and gloom. In August it was Arsene Wenger’s head being offered up as a sacrificial lamb to the ever-hungry gods of the managerial merry-go-round. November seems to belong to Chelsea’s Andre Villas-Boas. Not a week goes by without fans calling for Steve Kean’s P45 at Ewood Park and after a run of bad form, the Spotlight of Doom seems to be settling in on Steve Bruce at Sunderland. Round and round we go. Where it stops nobody knows.
We all know it’s wrong. We can see it happening before our very eyes. In the end our beloved teams will betray us. But they say love is blind. Dispatches is proud to welcome the fabulous Juliet Jacques to the Sofa as she confesses to her very tainted love.
Read more on Confessions Of An Armchair Immoralist by Juliet Jacques…
…and other tales of footballing niceness.
If I were to ask you what your favourite biscuit was, you’d probably tell me it was a chocolate digestive or a Jammy Dodger. Maybe even a custard cream. For the record, I’m particularly partial to a bourbon myself. I’d hazard a guess that a ‘Nice’ biscuit would rarely feature. That’s a shame. When I’m walking down the supermarket aisle deciding upon which particular tea-break treat I fancy, I tend to overlook the sugar-coated coconut biscuit but when on occasion I do partake, I often find that a ‘Nice’ biscuit is, well, nice.
Read more on How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love Harry Redknapp……
Tabloid journalists and the truth may be a contradiction in terms, but for this reporter honesty is clearly the best policy. Steven Hughes plonks himself onto the Football Sofa to explain why his relationship with his hero is a very subjective affair.
In Defence Of Luis Suarez by Rachael Singh
What’s The Point Of Scottish Football?
Captain Caveman: The De-evolution of John Terry
Alan Davies Is Here All Week
Liverpool Football Club, 1892 – 2012 – An Obituary
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